006

I’m lying in a hotel room.

I turn my head to the right, towards the clock on the bedside table.  The red LED lights bleed into the surrounding darkness and show me the time in all it’s digital beauty. 

03:11.

I look to my left at the still body next to me.

It’s time.

I roll over towards her, the first point of contact I make is with my middle finger against the outline of her ear, I curve her hair back behind it and reveal her neck.  The site of fresh uncovered skin fills my cock with blood and the temptation to delve both rows of teeth into this angelic chocolate skin is over whelming.  She is lying on her side, I run my nose and lips across her shoulder, following the line up her neck towards her ear lobe.  She murmurs and reaches my hand that has now found it’s way onto her hip, she intertwines her fingers with mine and shuffles backwards against me, letting out a moan as she does.

I lie there perfectly still, my nose against her neck, inhaling and filling my lungs with her scent, my willpower is starting to wane. 

She pushes her ass back into me and I snap.

My right arm constricts and bolts her down next to me like a python, she lets out a scream but my left hand quickly covers her mouth to stop the room next to us thinking I’m killing her.  I sink my teeth into her beautiful neck and all I can feel is lust.

I feel like a vampire.

She bites my hand to stop herself from screaming or to try and get me to stop from biting, I’m not sure but I don’t care.

I taste blood.

I let go of her and she spins around to face me, a look of fear on her face cuts through the darkness, she hits me.  She slaps my face and starts hitting on my chest, scratching and clawing at me.  I grab her by the throat and jam my tongue into her mouth, she pulls away but I grab her again and kiss her again hard, she grabs my hair and pulls it back hard enough to make us break apart.  She headbutts me and jams her tongue into my mouth, our tongues collide, she kisses back for the first time since we met.  Hard and ferocious, rushed and aggressive I feel like I’ve finally awakened an animal capable of running with me.

I grab her t-shirt with my right hand and tear it off of her, the fibres splitting apart as I man handle her across the bed.  She falls out of the top exposing her tits for the first time, her hands are all over me, I feel her scratching at my back as my mouth moves from her lips down to her large erect nipples.  I push her backwards and pin her down, the pressure I am using I know will leave bruises so I press down harder just to be sure.  Her head is dangling off the edge of the bed, I bite down on her nipples as she screams for my name.

I don’t even bother going down on her, I reach down, slide her underwear to the side and push my middle finger inside her, she gasps as I curve it upwards and drag it slowly out of her soaking wet pussy.  I reach down with both hands and tear her panties apart, exposing her tidy and freshly shaven cunt.  She is still on her back with her head over the edge of the bed, so I grab her hips and spin her onto her front.  I pull her hips upwards and back towards my cock, I lean forward and grab a handful of hair and yank her back, she moans and begs for me to fuck her in a hushed whisper.

I slam my dick into her hard and I’m sure I hit her cervix.  Still with a handful of hair pulling her head back, her ass in the air forcing her to arch her back, I fuck her as hard as I can, slamming her into the mattress beneath us.  I feel powerful and unstoppable, I want to split her in half, I want to make her bleed, I want her to walk like she’s been fucked by an animal.  I can feel her tight little cunt contracting around my shaft and the noise she is making is almost primal, it’s such a turn on that I feel myself about to come, I push harder and harder, my groin starts to ache and my sweat drips down onto her back, faster and faster until I think I’m about to have break her then I finally let go.

I explode deep inside of her, my balls contract and my cock pulses out reams after reams of hot, sticky come inside her tight snatch for what seems like an eternity.

I roll off of her and she doesn’t move, the thumping of my heart against my ribcage is almost hypnotic, I feel alive. 

I close my eyes just as she thanks me.

005

I see her standing in front of me, naked and imperfect. 

My eyes trace the outlines of her form, a form I know better than the roads and neuropathways inside of my own mind.  Curves and lines I have run my lips over, Skin tones and scars my mind has drawn a million times to remember the moments. 

I stand and stare at the figure before me.

Nothing.

The far off lighthouse of hope in my chest has gone.  

A weight instead sinks south from my throat, working it’s way down, swallowing everything in it’s path leaving a wonderful void in it’s wake.  Everything that was once felt has disappeared as if it was a bad dream.

Realisation hits me like a pinprick bursting a balloon, being hit by a car.  I feel nothing, I look and see just another naked girl standing in front of me.

Just another meaningless girl.

Then the pain moves away and the dullness of reality sets back in.

Love doesn’t conquer all.

004

She’s on top, straddling me and pinning me down against my freshly washed bed sheets.  The smell of detergent is being masked by the smell of wine, sweat and pussy.  I look up at her and she is soaking up the idea that she can dominate me.  I stare at her, she seems cocky and assured; as if she really believes that she can hold me back.

I let her believe it. 

She bites my chest hard, drawing blood.  I lay motionless, unreactive and still.  She stares at me and starts talking about how much she can control boys, how she always takes control. 

“You’re so weak, like all the rest” she laughs as she spits her statement.  She slaps my face and runs her hands through my hair, curling her tiny fists into balls, pulling my hair just like my father used to. 

I smile at the memory.

She pulls her hand back to slap me again.  I move seamlessly, in what to me feels like slow motion and what to her must feel like a human snake bite.  My right hand intercepts her open palm and my left arrows onto her throat.  Within milliseconds she is pinned up against the wall opposite my bed by her throat and she’s silent.

She thinks I’ve lost control and I can see the fear shake in her eyes.  What she doesn’t know is that my heartbeat is barely raised and I haven’t yet felt the need to exhale yet.  My hips are supporting her entire weight, not my hand round her neck.  The impact she felt against the wall was from my knees and right forearm exactly as I intended.  It was as meticulous as it was rushed, everything was exacting and surgical. 

She is in no pain and no danger, she feels perfectly safe.

But now she feels powerless.

We haven’t broken eye contact yet as I move in to kiss her.  She responds with such a desperate passion, such subservient moans that half make me want to protect and half take advantage of her.

“You’re incredible.  Fuck me like a bad girl.  Use me, use me like the dirty little slut I am - take me please, PLEASE ****** TAKE ME!”

She looking at me in awe as I slide just the tip of myself inside of her.  She squeezes me the way a child squeezes their hand around a helium balloon, desperate for me not to leave, desperate for me not to break this moment.  I’m holding her entire weight up so that my cock is just inside her, she tries to move down but I tighten my grip around her throat and tell her to stay still.

“You’ve been such a bad girl now I’m going to punish you”.  “You need to be punished”.  She moans in agreement.

“Beg for it you dirty fucking whore”

I run my lips grazingly up her neck to her ear where I bite her lobe, she shivers as I repeat myself “beg for it you dirty fucking whore”. 

“Please, I want it so much, please give it to me, now, now take me, I beg you please fuck me, I want to feel you explode, please baby oh PLEASE BABY!”

I thrust into with enough force to bruise my balls against her, she screams in shock and surprise, I feel her convulse and contract around me like a python.  Her nails dig deep into my back and she is still screaming as I continually slam into her again and again, she cries out inaudibly as just as she is about to come I stop.

Dead.

I drop her to the floor.

“You will come when I say you can come, now get down on your knees”.

And the fun and games begin.

003

I push her up against the white, almost sterile looking tiled wall of my shower with intent, she gasps with broken excitement and anticipation.  I force open her mouth with my tongue, she pushes back kissing me as if I was holding a gun to her head. 

My eyes are closed so tight, I don’t want to see her face and I cannot help but wish it was you, I wish more than anything that it was you pressed against me.  I pull away and bite her ear lobe in a vain attempt to hide the look on my face, in other news I suck at poker.  She grips me tightly around my neck.  I think to myself that turning this women on is too easy, if only she could return the favour.  I run my tongue down the side of her neck, her nipples become hard and she whispers my name, slightly missing the sexual overtones she aimed for and instead making me laugh inside at how awkward and forced that sounded.  My hand moves down between her legs, I can feel how wet she is and this never surprises me. 

I slip my left index finger inside of her just half an inch, her eyes roll back into her head and nothing but dry air escapes her throat.  I push my index finger further inside, I curl my finger towards her belly button and her reaction is obvious.  I feel her tense around a single digit and cry out.

For once I’m more concerned about leaving my favourite place than my own orgasm.  Not even the thoughts of covering her eyes in my come and her having to explain to her mother and sister that it’s just chronic hayfever can make me stay in the shower.

I feel like she has invaded the one space that is my own.

I don’t even bother with a towel as I make my way to the kitchen, hunting for some juice to wash the taste of her out of my mouth.

Orgasm. That’s the answer.

lostinthehorizon:

Even though right now I have a boyfriend I still think I’m a lesbian. Don’t get me wrong, I like him, a lot, but as a person, and he is attractive (which is weird, because I don’t find guys attractive) but I just don’t get wet like I know I can, and I haven’t had an orgasm since… her… and she wasn’t even that good in bed.

Can you live happily with someone even if that means being sexually insatisfied?

*————————————————————————-*

In a word, no.

Allow me to elaborate without sounding like a jaded, arrogant or faux worldy fuck.

If you’re not enjoying the sex, then the sex isn’t important.  If the sex isn’t important to you then you won’t mind it stopping on a permanent basis.  If the sex stops, then you’re are just friends. 

Circular reasoning?  Maybe.

Since I learnt what an orgasm was, I’ve always known the power of the orgasm.  I’ve known for a long time that the man (or woman) who can give a girl have the most intense powerful orgasm wins.

It doesn’t matter if you’re Brad Pitt, Edward Cullen or Ron fucking Burgundy; if you cant make her cum as hard as I can, sayonara.

If you can make her laugh afterwards then it’s game over.

It’s crude and it breaks us down to our most basic, hedonistic shells. This is why people will hate this post.  It’s the same when you explain how life began on this planet and people disagree because it’s uncomfortable to think there was never a reason.  People love the idea of something deeper, something higher, something to turn to.  They prefer to believe in the “comfortable” rather than the truth. 

Girls AND guys will huff and puff and disagre that I am wrong, but I don’t care.

I’m right so get over it.

I’ve seen first hand girls leaving boyfriends all because some guy gave them their first squirting orgasm and made them laugh so hard they cried post fuck.  I’ve seen respectable girls with good husbands falling in love with guys after a weeks.  I’ve seen lesbians fucking men, and straight women fucking girls. 

Welcome to the power of the orgasm.

                                     *****

On a personal note; I absolutely love women, but I get bored very easily and from my personal experience would go so far as to say that VERY FEW women are actually “good” in bed.  Also again from personal experience, I would say that I have found a lot of women are actually very selfish in bed.  They will let you give them orgasm after orgasm without even the slightest offer of returning the favour.

002

I survey the bar for prey.

I feel kind of lethal, how a serial killer would feel standing in the check out line at the supermarket. As if I have a secret that no one knows.

I walk towards the bar, with the slightest of smirks on my face. I walk through the crowd in the vague direction of the bar, I fucking hate night clubs. It’s as if everyone turns from normal working, civilized people into arrogant, aggressive nymphomanics.

I’ll blend in well.

I make eye contact with every attractive girl that passes, they all smile shyly. Each one of them gets a look that’s part caveman, part caveman, there is no sensitive side tonight. This club is busy and hot, the smell of cheap drinks and sweat pollutes my nostrils, the occasional whiff of perfume makes it just a little more paletable.

Upon reaching the bar I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror opposite, either side of me are two girls, one blonde and one brunette, both fuckable. Which one do I want? I realise the brunette looks like the type of girl who likes rough anal sex. Well, from experience every girl likes anal with a knife under their chin.

I take a cherry lollipop out of my shirt pocket and unwrap it slowly, as if I’m in slow motion. I pop the sweet into my mouth and I can tell she is looking at me now, all curious.

Curiousity did kill that cat.

I turn to her and smile, lollipop in my mouth I wink. She looks down instantly, submissive and smiling. She runs her left hand through her hair, doing so she reveals an ear and some neck. My pupils dilate and my mind wanders, thoughts of sinking my teeth into her neck fill my mind and I’m lost in my own world.

“Yes mate?” Shouts the barman over the music and bass, breaking my daydream.

The brunettes eyes meet mine, “What’ll it be?” I say to her.

****

I’m walking back into the club, barely able to put one foot in front of the other. I’m sweaty and my legs ache, my throat is dry and I can taste blood. I smile to myself, and walk through the dancefloor. With each bump and knock I feel the energy transfering into me, picking me up. The music is the good kind of loud and I feel like a million dollars, albeit with achey balls.

After I asked the brunette at the bar what will it be, she excited and flustered asked me what I was having?

When I replied “You”.

It was game over.

She gasped, I could see her pupils dilating and her lack of bra didn’t help hide the fact her nipples had become very erect, I actually felt outdone as I only had a semi. I pulled the lollipop out of my mouth and slowly moved it towards her mouth. She leans towards me I move the sweet away so our lips nearly touch, she smells of vodka and sweet perfume, I’m no longer semi erect.

I bring my hand up, placing my forefinger under her chin bringing her in for the kiss, she’s soft like a girl should be and I bring both arms around her and she cups my face. I can no longer hear the music in the club or the loud, obnoxious people shouting. Everything fades out and it’s just us, we lock fingers and she presses her hips into mine and lets out the tiniest of moans. I break away from the kiss and smile, she strokes away the hair from her face and looks at me eagerly as if she is in a rush.

I smile and start to walk, she follows and grabs my hand. I lead her through the busy dancefloor, pushing my way through the crowds with my prey in tow. We emerge the otherside intact and awakened, we make our way quickly towards the exit.

Once outside she is all over me like rain. We kiss so hard and fast it almost hurts, I darg her around the corner down a small alleyway behind the club. I push her up against the cold bricks and she unbuckles my belt as I slide up her dress, my hand finds her wet pussy and she moans as I push my index finger deep into her and curl it towards me. I feel her nails dig into my neck, hard enough to give me a souvenir of this moment, I wonder what my co-workers will say?

She has me in her hands and is stroking furiously, she whispers to me she wants me inside her. I whisper back that it’s anal or I’ll walk. She confirms just how good a judge of character I really am, she drops to her knees and my dick disappears in the greatest way a man can experience. I feel myself getting close so I pull away and pull her up towards me, the look in her eyes is a mixture of arousal and sheer amazement. She spins around and leans forward against the wall, I look down and pull her up dress over the glorious curve of her ass, and drop a glob of spit down inbetween her pert buttocks. She moans and pulls her ass apart for me and I guide myself in, just the tip at first. She gasps with pleasure as I slide further inside of her, I pull her hair towards me and bite the back of her neck hard as I slam the rest of me deep into her tight ass. She lets out a loud scream as she cums, her body bucks and spasms as she ejaculates onto my new shoes.

I continue fucking her but I’m distracted my a buzzing sound by my feet. I look down and see her phone lighting up the inside of her handbag. I look closer and I can see “Christian” is calling her, along with a picture of the two of them at dinner. The thought of her boyfriend looking around the club for his girlfriend while I am fucking her turns me on. I start thrusting harder while pulling her hips against mine, she tells me she wants me to come in her ass I’m getting close and the more I think about her cheating on her boyfriend with me the closer I get. I’m so close that I have to pull out and push her down onto her knees, she is more than willing to do so and inhales my dick like she is on camera. She blows me, inbetween telling me she wants me to come in her mouth, I go over the edge and explode all over her face and hair, she tries to get as much in her mouth as possible but my aim is never that good. I feel like Peter North after I am done, she is covered in my come and I smile, looking down at this gorgeous brunette wiping my ejaculate from her face into her mouth like I had a gun to her head, I can only help but wonder; will she kiss her boyfriend with that mouth?

001

After I come, my patience for her presence suddenly diminishes.  She’s holding me tight and I feel like I will be stuck here forever, stuck in this human straight jacket like prisoner of my own weakness.  I force myself to kiss her, long and deeply, with enough passion to convince even myself that I actually like this one.  I pull away and kiss her cheeks and forehead, desperatley hoping that this show of affection will be enough to exchange for my freedom.  I roll onto my back and she follows, rolling over onto my chest.  I look down at her with a mixture of disgust, pity and arrogance.

I don’t have a clue what the fuck I am doing here with her.

I ask her if she wants a drink, but I’m not listening to her answer and I get up regardless.  I trudge my way downstairs, light headed I grab a beer from the fridge and some chocolate.  There is one plus side to all of this soulless sex; the chocolate tastes very good afterwards. 

I walk past my room as quiet as a man who doesn’t want to have sex again, she’s asleep.  The relief washes over me like blanket of hope, the kind that trapped miners must feel upon reaching the surface after months in the darkness.  I turn on the shower, the smell of pussy and sweat is tattoo’d onto me and I feel shame.  About five minutes into my shower I hear the door go.  A voice of expectation and excitement pollutes the room, I look back and she’s already climbing in to join me.

“That was amazing”.  She says.

I already I know it was amazing, as she won’t shut up about it.  If you’d asked my honest opinion it would have been entirely different.  It’s like when someone tries to tell you that Avatar was a great film, you just want to shoot them in the face with a whale harpoon.

She wraps her arms around me, kissing inbetween my shoulder blades.  In my head it’s someone completely different and the thought of that girl makes my dick go instantly hard.  Her hands slip down my chest and over my stomach, she reaches my cock and starts to work it slowly and without any real rhythm or technique, I’ll have to fuck her if I am going to come.  I spin her around and kiss her, she moans and melts into my arms. 

“I’m going to come all over her face”.  I whisper to myself.  This makes me happy.

We fuck in the shower and she wont shut up about how hot it is and how good it felt.

I don’t have a clue what the fuck I am doing here with her.

                                                    ****

It’s 3:13am in the morning and the girl is crying about something I couldn’t care less about.  I think she is crying because I don’t want to sleep with her, because I have had enough of sleeping with someone who I get no pleasure from.  I of course don’t say this, I explain (lie) to her that I am not in the mood for sex but this is of little consequence to her as she wants sex now.  I ask why and she say’s that it’s become addictive.  I tell her that she is pathetic and to have some self control and she starts screaming at me and throwing slaps towards me, saying how I’ve been using her and how much of a cunt I am.

At least she got half of it right.

The ironic thing is that this is the same girl who eight years previously had rejected in high school.  And subsequently rejected me every year throughout high school, I was probably obsessed with her in the most normal of insecure adolescent ways.  I used to think we were going to “go steady” one day until she fucked some guy in my bathroom during a house party I was throwing.  I remember having to explain to my mother that the reason why I had to throw away the white bath towels was because someone had spilt red Fanta all over them.  In truth it was the blood from my crushes recently broken hymen that had ruined them.  Hearing her fucking another guy on the floor of my bathroom wasn’t a highpoint, I don’t know whether the teenage me ever recovered from that…

Fast forward five years and she’s broken up with her high school sweet heart.  She comes back to town and we bump into each other.  I owe the insecure teenager inside of me this moment, the moment that he wanted so bad. 

So I seduce her.

We fuck.

I wonder what on earth I ever saw in her.  She then tells me she wants to fuck me every weekend as she is sick of guys not making her come, I ask her if she is using me for sex and she says she is without the slightest hint of irony.  I get bored and reject her in a way where my conscience will stay clear and I can walk away like the innocent party, it’s all about appearences you know. 

She’s angry and upset, she tells me that she loves me like every other girl has, eventually we stop talking, and the visits stop. 

The teenage boy inside of me got what he wanted, but it’s pretty soul destroying fucking someone who you don’t find attractive.  Never mind it’s sex I suppose, albeit at the expense of my self respect.

Who needs self respect?